My father's memoir on Thursday
There will a simple ceremony, according to the Chinese customs and traditions, serves as a reminder and memories of those who have passed by...
I could not help but feel a bit down for that day to come by...
In fact, I will be away for the next three days. Today, I'm away from home. However, I managed to make arrangements so that I can be home on Thursday morning to join in the ceremony. Thank goodness! :)
I have regretted not doing, or doing things that I shouldn't have, and for this simple ceremony, I DO NOT WANT to regret missing it. Both my sisters will be back home to join in the ceremony.
My other brothers are too far away... but I think dad will understand them...
Another thing... the 3rd year after someone passed away is a very significant ceremony for Chinese. It also signifies the end of the 'observing filiality period', which was stated as a three years period. The ideas stemmed from Confucian teaching that we should honour our predecessors and ancestors for three years after their passing.
What is this 'observing filiality period'?
In the olden days, this means that children of the deceased would shift to stay in the burial ground, or next to the burial sites of their deceased parent. That's why the olden burial sites can be as large as a house... so that the deceased children can stay inside it during the filiality period.
Though noble, this practice is no longer a norm among Chinese. Observation of the filiality period is done un-officially, where one keeps reminding oneself about the deceased. Even this, sadly, is seldom observed, let alone practicing it...
Frankly, it is not easy to do it... even for myself, though I thought of dad sometimes. I somehow miss him... :(
In the modern time, I only came to know that there's only one person who have done this - staying by his father's burial site for three years, observing the tradition of filiality period in the most traditional manner. That person, a monk by the name of Venerable Xuan Hua, who resides in United States in his later years. Venerable has also passed away himself... but during his lifetime, he had a very, very large followers, due to, I believe, his unsurpassed virtues...
Though I found this quite an impossible practice to be observed in the modern time, I somehow admire the spirit behind this ceremony. And I certainly admire the insights and wisdom shown by our great teacher - Kung Fuzi (Confucian). And one day, I will definitely write something about him and his teachings!
Cheers,
C. Guan Soo
http://www.TaichiExerciseForHealth.com


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